Parental Leave - How employers can support their employees and navigate this emotionally challenging time.
Bethany Pearson, Director at Grayling and PR Mums Founding Mum
Parental Leave - How employers can support their employees and navigate this emotionally challenging time.
Despite well-intentioned wishes of ‘enjoy your time off!’ before turning your out-of-office on, anyone who’s had the fortune to go on parental leave will categorically agree that annual leave this is not! Unless your idea of time off is one where you are governed by a teeny but incredibly demanding holiday rep who shouts at you all day and night, and thanks you with the occasional vom on your freshly washed hair.
That’s not to paint a terrible picture of parental leave, as it’s an incredibly joyful and exciting time too - I’m lucky enough to be on mat leave for the second time now. After considering my own experiences and with input from PR parent friends, I hope the following advice is helpful for any employers on how to support their employees and help them navigate this emotionally challenging time.
BEFORE
It’s a strange countdown before a team member heads off to have a baby, but as it’s a lengthy period of time, you can make the most of it to establish the best working practices while they’re on parental leave.
Agree communication format: Naturally, there won’t be a one-size-fits-all approach but it’s worth having an honest conversation with your team member to agree key details about how and when they’d like to be contacted and understand what they want to be updated on; whether it’s big business news, team changes, or even office gossip. There is absolutely nothing wrong in them not wanting to know anything about work as well. I am very content in being detached from work while on mat leave – there’s enough madness in my life right now without adding anything else to the mix!
Review achievements: Ensure that any reviews are complete ahead of time, even if this doesn’t fit specifically with your company appraisal timings. Progression is a very real worry for anyone taking time out of the business, so rewarding your colleague’s achievements will showcase your commitment to their career development.
Remind them they can take as much time as they want: Communicate that although you’ll miss them, there is no rush to return to work. This can be especially important for male colleagues. A friend who works at a global tech company which offers impressive paternity leave told me that only one in four men take the full period, citing reasons of ‘falling behind’, progression or even perception. Everyone’s entitled to take the amount of time that feels right for them, but make sure that they feel fully supported and if they’re planning on coming back earlier than expected, it’s not due to a problematic workplace culture.
DURING
Open and honest conversations: During any agreed check ins, give them the opportunity to honestly share how they’re really feeling. It’s natural that they may want to present a front that they still have the same approach to work. While this may be true for some, they have been through a colossal change, so it is understandable if their outlook has evolved after growing their family. There are so many benefits to having parents on your team including their incredible ability to juggle, prioritise, work efficiently and deal with whatever (sometimes literal!) sh*t is thrown their way, so it’s important to show you acknowledge and appreciate that, while genuinely listening and responding to any worries or concerns they may have.
KIT days: While all employers have to offer paid keeping in touch (KIT) days, it’s at the employee’s discretion whether to take them. Many see them as an essential way to get their head in the game before returning to work, but others, who may not want to burst their baby bubble, might choose not to take them. If they do choose to take KIT days, make sure they’re beneficial for both your employee and organisation by briefing and supporting them on realistically achievable tasks and projects during the allocated time frame.
WHEN RETURNING
No pressure: When agreeing a return-to-work date, take into consideration that your colleague may have changed their mind on anything that was initially floated. Make sure that nothing you do or say when discussing this feels like you’re pressuring parents to come back, e.g. any early return incentives or bonuses and that it’s completely on their own terms.
Flexible return: Make sure that you’ve discussed any flexible working options well in advance and consider a staggered return if that suits them and your team set-up. This is something that I did after my first baby, and it was incredibly helpful in ensuring that I got up to speed at the pace that suited me and didn’t feel too overwhelmed after being out of the business for a significant amount of time.
Put them on good stuff! This should be obvious, but don’t stitch up parental leave returners with the projects that nobody else wants. I’ve heard of several friends who were given ‘problem accounts’ by their agencies when they came back to work, regardless of the results they’d achieved and relationships they’d built. Most people coming back will be determined to (re-)prove themselves, so they may not want to make a fuss and will crack on, but if they were motivated with some brilliant projects that show how much you value them, this would make for a much more impactful return for all. .
Parent network: Encourage your team member to ‘buddy up’ with other parents in the business or industry to get some tips and advice on what worked for them and how to the navigate the inevitable challenges that work and parenting present! Signposting them to the PR Mums website and community would be a great first step to helping them establish a network of PR parents to connect with and be supported by.
Show your support: Show that you value them both as a colleague and in their new role as a parent. It’s hard not to take a confidence knock when you’ve been on parental leave. I felt apprehensive and completely torn between work and being a parent when returning to work, but I am lucky to have been supported by brilliant bosses since becoming a mum and they helped restore my confidence.
None of this is rocket science of course. It’s just about caring for your employees, not just looking like you do, and appreciating the monumental changes they’ve gone through and the impact that will have had on their confidence and approach to work. This will help create the most supportive working environment and truly be the best ‘welcome back’ hug they could ever wish for.